“You can’t be annoyed at feminism being called feminism when entire history of human race is called mankind.” – marsjpg@twitter
Peon was scratching the name from cabin’s door. Ms. Preksha Gupta was now Mrs. Preksha Srivastava. And that gave a new topic to my colleagues to discuss. Some so called open minded were saying she should have changed her surname to Gupta- Srivastava. And of course religious patriarchal misogynist were having their stand in the shadows of Indian culture and it’s so called ‘Parampara’.
And I was so confused. It was beyond my understanding that why should someone who had their unique identity for last 25-30 years, suddenly change their name. No one can even find you on ‘Facebook’ after new name.
Then conversation just heated. And it forced me to think. I knew that Indian marriage system needed some changes. Some basic guidelines were needed for people who just can’t think like modern world. So here are some of my views, this might hurt your religious views but someone has to say it.
- Change in surname: No one should change their name after marriage. It’s your identity, people know you by your name. If you want to change patriarchy, this should be the first step.
- Baby’s surname: Next question that will arrive after different surnames of parents will be – what should be the surname of new born baby?
My honest question is why do we need our surname? Leave the baby out of your belief system. Is it about religion? Teach him all religions, let him choose his own religion and surname.
- Money: People share their chores when they are roommates. Even in living relationship everyone is happy to divide day to day works, I don’t know what changes in relationship after marriage? Where does that attitude come from? Why quarrels starts. Is it about money? But nowadays both men and women earn money. Hell! Both must earn money, its god damn expensive out there. Have different accounts and one joint account for house purpose.
Sign Prenuptial agreement. Why? Same reasons people should get medically tested before marriage. Just in case.
I could write more points, but I don’t want you to take my views. I want people to have their own views. Take a time out. Think. What should be the future be like and what are you doing for the same?
I made many such points in office argument. A girl who was fighting for feminism really liked my views. We really hit it off. Later we went on a date. I don’t know why she thought I would pay the bill?